Give Support to a Colon Cancer Patient

I know it's been awhile since I've checked in with Cancer Nerd. Been quite busy with my MBA and a blog I have started with the women in my class, which you can check out here.

But today I write with something way more important. I received an email from a very good friend of mine, forwarded from a friend of hers. Please take a moment to read this and follow the link to Audra's Journey:

As most of you know one of my very best friends since the age of 9, Audra, has been diagnosed with Stage 4 Colon Cancer that has already metastasized to her liver. She is only 37 years old and after a long battle with infertility and losing her first son in-utero very late in the pregnancy she finally had Adam and Olivia her twins just 9 months ago.

Obviously, we are all devastated and shocked by this news, we are choosing to believe in the infinite possibilities and miracles!

I have started a website for her in which people can log on and read her story and journal entries. On this website you can also log onto her guestbook and send her a message of inspiration and support. Most of you know her but even if you do not please take the time to check in on this website occasionally and send her messages. Audra is a big believer in the power of thought and the more people who are sending love and light and energy the better for her healing and for her psyche to fight! I am begging that you do this for her. Lets make it a movement for her.

The website is www.caringbridge.org and her website name is: audrasjourney.When you get to the site it will say "visit a caring bridge website" this is where you enter, audrasjourney.

Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart.

Here is a direct link which should also work.

Please reach out and show your support to Audra today!

Be All You Can Be... in the Army of Women

October is breast cancer awareness month in the USA, as I'm sure all of you know. It's almost impossible these days to not be bombarded by pink everywhere you go!

The success of the breast cancer awareness movement in the last 20 years or so has been truly remarkable and inspiring (if a little envy-inducing for those of us who advocate primarily for another type of cancer). Huge scientific progress has been made thanks to the hundreds of millions of dollars (if not more) that have been raised by various breast cancer organizations, like Susan G. Komen for the Cure and the Avon Foundation.

There is a new initiative on the breast cancer scene this year, and it's a revolutionary one! The Army of Women, a joint initiative of the Avon Foundation and the Dr. Susan Love Research Foundation, has set a goal of recruiting one MILLION healthy women to volunteer for breast cancer prevention research studies. The Army of Women launch was recently announced on the Today Show (click here to see!).

Leave it to women to take such an incredibly proactive approach in helping to eradicate this devastating disease. Very cool.

For more information, and to join the Army of Women, click here.

You go girls!

Cancer Takes a Hike

I just heard about this amazing website through the Colon Cancer Alliance September e-newsletter.

The site is called Cancer Takes a Hike, and was started by a Stage IV colon cancer patient named Andrew Stevens. Stevens was diagnosed in 2005. As he says on the site, "I had tumors in my colon, liver, spleen, and on my right adrenal gland and was given just a few months to live. Now, even after four surgeries and almost 40 rounds of chemotherapy, I still have cancer. But due to the amazing care from my doctors and nurses and an outpouring of love and support from my wife, family, friends, and thoughts and prayers of many, I am closing in on the four year anniversary of my diagnosis."

In honor of this incredible milestone, Stevens is hiking 160 miles of the Appalachian Trail with his brother and a good friend.

Fairly mind-blowing, eh? I certainly think so!

In addition to raising awareness by attempting this arduous hike, Stevens is also raising funds for the Colon Cancer Alliance. To make a donation to the CCA in honor of Andrew Stevens and Cancer Takes a Hike, click here.

First Day of School

I start my MBA program today. I have been anticipating the start of this degree for over two years, and now, today, it begins.

There are many things I have correctly anticipated about what this - my first day of school - would be like. I am wearing a suit. The day begins with coffee and a meet-and-greet. There will be formal introductions, a class portrait, a champagne reception (Yipee!). I will meet tons of new people and remember some of their names. I will meet my professors and try to not be intimidated, but I will be intimidated, and that's okay. I will finish the day exhausted but - I hope - exhilarated.

What I never could have imagined, and what will be with me all day long, is this:

My stepdad once studied at the university at which I am matriculating.

And:

Today is his birthday.

John did a summer science program here, and he was in nerd heaven (as I soon will be, though studying finance, not physics). He loved this place. He and my mom lived here that summer, and thereafter our house was adorned in university paraphernalia. Tea towels, mugs, plates, t-shirts, sweatshirts, scarves, baseball caps, winter hats, posters, calendars.

Now, all that paraphernalia (and all the new paraphernalia my mom and I have since added to the collection) takes on a new meaning, as this becomes my school, my future graduate alma mater.

The universe works in mysterious ways. I know that's a corny thing to say, but I believe it. And I will relish the connection I will feel to John, today and every day that I study here. I know he would have been bursting with pride and telling everyone within earshot that I am doing my MBA here, just like he did when I got a perfect score on my math SAT ten years ago.

I believe there is good karma all around me today, and I will absorb it as best I can.

Happy Birthday, John. Thank you for inspiring me to be the best student, and the best person, I can be.

SU2C Broadcast - Only One Kleenex Needed!

Here it is.



My boyfriend and I watched the show last night on the biggest computer screen in our house. I have to say, even though it was a bit chaotic, with some celebs missing their marks (ahem, Ms. Dunst) and some camera flubs - overall I was incredibly impressed.

The content of the show was perfect in its balance of scientific information, celebrity involvement, and humor. I appreciated that within the science sections of the show, viewers were presented with groundbreaking reseach (hooray nanotechnology!) but also with basic facts ("Don't start smoking.") that Americans, unfortunately, still need to hear too urgently.

My favorite humorous part of the show was when Katie Couric and Charles Barkley talked about their colonoscopies. In a show that was so scripted (and necessarily so, I know) it was great to see Katie being her charming self, improvising a bit with Sir Charles. And who knew the "Round Mound of Rebound" (thank you, boyfriend, for coming up with that old nickname of his!) was so funny? He had more stage presence than a lot of the actors! Not to mention how great it is that he had his colonoscopy filmed in the first place. Bravo, Mr. Barkley. And thank you.

Yes, the tears flowed. I don't know how Halle Berry, Casey Affleck, Jen Garner and Forest Whitaker made it through their "Imagine" montage when they read out stories written by those affected by cancer in the most dramatic, tragic ways. And seeing Patrick Swayze - even though I knew he was opening the show - was really tough. He has thinned out so much. In my head I will always see him as Johnny, his beloved "Dirty Dancing" character - so seeing him looking so gaunt was tough for me. It reminded me a lot of my stepdad, too, which always knocks the wind out of the ol' tummy.

Anyway, I am thrilled that I finally got to watch the show, and even more thrilled that the show raised over $100 million! A drop in the bucket compared to what our country has spent on the Iraq war, and far from what is needed to truly CURE this disease - but it's a very, very good start.

Onward!

SU2C Full Stream Available Online!

Good news!

Tara let me know that the FULL broadcast of "Stand Up to Cancer" is now available online! And unlike regular TV shows that are online in the States, I can actually watch this one from London! Which I will do tonight. Excellent.

The broadcast is available here.

Tara's blog also has some GREAT behind-the-scenes photos from the event! Click here to see them.

Thanks, Tara! And have a WONDERFUL wedding next week!

Cover Your Butt! And the Butts of Your Fellow Americans!

I received an email today from C3, the Colorectal Cancer Coalition, with an urgent message and easy task.

Right now, there are three bills in Congress that - if passed - would cover screenings for three huge constituencies of Americans: the poor and underserved, the elderly and those with private insurance.

To sign the petition click here.

The three Acts are as follows:

• HR 1738: The Colorectal Cancer Prevention, Early Detection, and Treatment Act will establish a program at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) to provide colorectal cancer screenings and treatment for low-income, uninsured and underinsured individuals who are not eligible for Medicare.
• HR 1926/S 1164: The Colon Cancer Screen for Life Act will expand existing Medicare coverage of colorectal cancer screening to include pre-procedure visits and other reimbursements, minimizing the out-of-pocket expenses for our nation’s elderly.
• HR 3060: The Colorectal Cancer Screening and Detection Coverage Act would require private health insurance plans to provide coverage for colorectal cancer. Plus, the bill will protect anyone from being denied a policy due to their need for colorectal cancer screening.

It takes about 10 seconds to sign the petition. In doing so, you are contributing to an effort to save lives.

On the C3 website, you can learn more about colon cancer advocacy initiatives. You can also send a letter to your local Congressmen encouraging them to support colorectal cancer screenings.

Stand Up to Cancer and Cover Your Butt!

Cranking Along the Cobblestones

I live on a quaint little cobblestone street in the middle of bustling London.

This afternoon, on my way to the gym (yes, I am taking advantage of my lady of leisure lifestyle before heading back to school!), I locked my door and turned to head down our street. Ahead of me was an older man in a wheelchair. He was probably in his late 60s or early 70s and wearing the requisite senior ensemble of khaki cordouroy pants and a maroon sweater. His lap was full of shopping bags from earlier errands. He cranked his wheelchair along the cobblestones, paused a moment to look into a neighbor's construction site, and cranked some more.

I watched him as I approached. His arms grasped and pushed the wheels forward, a huge effort that advanced the chair just a pinch. As he and his chair bumped along, my heart sank for the poor man and his jerky journey down our street.

I walked up to him and said, "Sir? Can I help you navigate these cobblestones?"

He smiled and in a perfect English accent replied, "No, thank you my dear. That's very kind. But this is very good exercise!"

I chuckled, smiled back, and left to go get some exercise of my own - my heart full of admiration for this stranger and his wheelchair.

I can only hope to have such an attitude toward adversity as I age and life throws at me what it will. I hope that when I feel sorry for myself, or am struck down by life's latest challenge, I will remember this man, tottering in his wheelchair along our little cobblestone street, a wide smile across his face, enjoying the exercise.

Just Stand Up!

Even though I won't be able to watch it from the UK (thank you, Uncle Bob, for recording it for me!) I have been following Stand Up to Cancer as the big day approaches and am very excited for the broadcast!


Yesterday I downloaded the new single "Just Stand Up," released on September 2 on iTunes. This song was recorded especially for the show and includes an absolutely stellar cast of female performers rockin' out with a great message to spread:

If the mind keeps thinking you’ve had enough
But the heart keeps telling you don’t give up
Who are we to be questioning, wondering what is what
Don’t give up
THROUGH IT ALL, JUST STAND UP!

Performers on the single include my personal fave these days, Leona Lewis, as well as Carrie Underwood, Mariah Carey, Fergie, Mary J. Blige, and many, many other superstars.

To be completely honest, the song is a little corny - but it's also catchy, and it's amazing that all these women came together to create it. You can listen to the single (and download it!) on iTunes here.

Also amazing? The celebrity lineup for the broadcast! LOOK: Casey Affleck, Jennifer Aniston, Christina Applegate, Lance Armstrong, Abigail Breslin, Josh Brolin, David Cook, Katie Couric, Dana Delany, Fran Drescher, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Kirsten Dunst, Elizabeth Edwards, Jon Favreau, America Ferrera, Charles Gibson, Neil Patrick Harris, Salma Hayek, Scarlett Johansson, Masi Oka, Danica Patrick, Christina Ricci, Robin Roberts, Homer Simpson, Marge Simpson, Meryl Streep, Hilary Swank, Charlize Theron, Goran Visnjic, Forest Whitaker, Brian Williams and Reese Witherspoon.

And apparently Brad Garrett is getting a live on-air prostate exam. Love it.

So please tune in! And let me know how it is!

The Grind Begins

Sigh... I have known this post day would come.

I am writing to say that I will be posting less often from now on, because I need to start focusing on my MBA work. But I will definitely keep this blog up and running, and I look forward to the insights I will gain as an MBA student!

There is so much more to learn and there will never be enough time to learn it, but I look forward to continuing to chronicle what I do learn (and when I do learn it) here.

So - sigh. But! Yay!

Onward.

Quote for the Long Weekend

We have come upon a holiday weekend here in the UK (yipee!) and my boyfriend and I are headed to Germany.

I won't be posting for a few days, so I will leave you all with one of my favorite quotes*. My mom and I discovered this morsel of wisdom and loveliness right around the first anniversary of my stepdad's death. We were in Sephora, walking by the philosophy section, when the Amazing Grace eau de toilette caught our eye.

A couple mornings ago, I realized that my Amazing Grace shampoo bottle has the same quote, and it's just as meaningful to me today as it was those years ago:

"how you climb up the mountain is just as important as how you get down the mountain. and so it is with life, which for many of us become one big gigantic test followed by one big gigantic lesson. in the end, it all comes down to one word. grace. it's how you accept winning and losing, good luck and bad luck, the darkness and the light."

Grace. Sometimes - many times - that really is all it takes.

Have a great weekend!

*By the way, for those of you grammar and spelling enthusiasts out there, I do know that I should be using the word "quotations" instead of "quotes" but I just like the short word better. Please take no offense.

Good News for Applegate

Great news! Christina Applegate has been pronounced cancer-free after undergoing a double mastectomy. Wow.

I have read a lot about mastectomies and other breast cancer treatments, between Bathsheba's Breast and The Secret History of the War on Cancer (which I am slowly but surely plowing through, I promise!). Needless to say, the various surgeries have come a long way, as has a woman's right and ability to choose how far to go with her treatment. Applegate's mother is a long-term breast cancer survivor who had a recurrence many years after having a single mastectomy. So Applegate's attitude was to take no chances on a recurrence. As she says, "I just wanted to kind of be rid of this whole thing for me. This was the choice that I made, and it was a tough one."

I applaud Applegate's proactive approach to her treatment and I am thrilled that the outcome is freedom from cancer. She also says she will start raising money for cancer research (catch her appearance on SU2C!), MRIs (the test that saved her life), and gene testing (she has the breast cancer gene, BRCA1).

Perhaps best of all, Applegate is raising awareness about breast cancer and cancer in general by speaking out. The breast cancer movement has been able to move into mainstream consciousness thanks to fearless women like Applegate, who will talk about their breast cancer candidly and publicly. I hope survivors of other cancers that still have stigmas attached to them (HELLO! Aren't butts just as cute as breasts? Come on, colon cancer survivors! Put the word out there!) will follow the example of these incredible women.

Share your thoughts about Applegate's cancer journey in the comment section!

To read the complete ABC News article and watch the video of Applegate's interview, click here.

Leroy Sievers, 1955-2008

Oh gosh. This is a sad one.

Header courtesy of NPR

Leroy Sievers, a well-known journalist, died last night. He was diagnosed with colon cancer in 2001, and passed away at the age of 53.

I have been following Leroy's cancer journey through his NPR blog, My Cancer. I must admit, I didn't read it as thoroughly as I could have - the parallels to my stepdad hit a little too close to home. But the blog is astonishing in its candor, and if you have the emotional energy for it, I greatly encourage you to read it.

Sievers began the blog in February 2006, when his cancer returned after first being treated four years earlier. What began as colon cancer had spread to his brain and lung. Sievers was told he had six months to live. Two and a half years later - this morning, at 7:59AM eastern time - came the post that began, "Dear Friends: I'm so sorry to bring you this news." And it wasn't written by Leroy.

Cancer never ceases to deal bad hands to good people, which, to me, is the most frustrating thing about it.

But instead, I try to focus on the silver lining: look at Sievers' legacy. Not only did he have an exceptional career as a journalist, but he has also left us his blog, My Cancer, the accomplishment of which he said he was most proud. This blog is tragic, but full of insight and even - way down deep in there, between the lines and beyond the pixels - hope.

What was to be Leroy's final post came on Thursday, August 14th. He titled it "The Dog We Never Had," and he wrote:

"He is the dog we never had.

He's a Bernese Mountain dog. A big one. We always knew what his name was going to be ...'Spanky' ... no matter what.

The fact that he would be a toy didn't really bother us. We couldn't have a real one because we both traveled too much.

So here he is, sitting with me on the bed. My comrade in cancer.

A boy and his dog."

To me, this post encapsulates the cancer journey. When my stepdad John was sick, especially in the final weeks and days of his life, we were all swirling in a sea of emotion. But even during that tumultuous time, I couldn't help but be fascinated by how the simplest things brought him joy. Like a child. This brilliant man, a physicist and an eternal academic, smiling like a boy in the final days of his life.

I remember thinking to myself at the time, "So this is the circle of life. It's not a cliche after all." Leroy Sievers' final post captures the same feeling. "A boy and his dog." Tragically, Leroy Sievers' circle, like John's, closed far too early. But how phenomenal that he let us all inside before it did.


For complete NPR coverage, click here.

I Stand For My Stepdad

Here I am! (At about 2:08 - right after the french bulldogs - coincidentally, my favorite type of dog! That must be a sign of something, right?)



Wow. Can't say I don't have tears streaming down my face after that one. Hope you'll take a moment to watch it all the way through.

To learn more about this video, check out When Tara Met Blog and SU2C's Virtual Stand Up.

Cancer Quote Friday!

As we greet (or, in my case, start to wrap up) another fabulous Friday, with brains fried by the week and flitting toward the weekend, it is my pleasure to offer someone else's wisdom for your consideration.

The following is an excerpt from an article in the Stand Up to Cancer online magazine about caregiving. The article is written by Ellen R. Silver, who is a nurse and also the mother of a long-term cancer survivor. The article is a great read! As a former caregiver, I feel like caregivers cannot hear these things enough...

"No matter what, the relationship must remain the same. If you are a parent, continue to parent. If you are a friend, continue to do the friend things you always did. If you are a co-worker, continue to work as a team. If you are a spouse, continue your marriage in the same way and manner.

The roles might be changing in the relationship--perhaps now the caregiver is taking the prominent role in some decision-making or taking on some additional duties – but the relationship must remain the same in your heart, in your style, in your approach. Changing the innate chemistry between you as the caregiver and the person with cancer will cause great harm to the relationship during the cancer experience and for years to come. So the most important tip is – be yourself!"

Word.

Have a great weekend!

Olympic Spirit when the Foe is Cancer

I must admit I am totally distracted by the Olympics these days. Michael Phelps! Holy cow! I just can't get enough.

Of course, the one race I missed the other day featured one of the most determined and high-spirited athletes: Eric Shanteau. Eric competed in the 200m breast stroke semifinal and set a personal best time. But he came in 10th overall, with his time .013 seconds short of assuring him a spot in the final.

Now that Eric's participation in the Olympics is over, he has another foe to face: testicular cancer.

Holy crap. Are you kidding me? This 24-year-old swimmer, the 10th best in the world in breaststroke, has cancer?! And he competed with cancer?! As if competing against the greatest athletes in the world wasn't enough, to have to compete against cancer at the same time is just awful. Not to mention that his father was diagnosed with lung cancer last summer, so his family has been coping with one traumatic diagnosis already. But Eric says that his father wanted to see him compete. And so he did. Eric's determination to realize his lifelong Olympic dream in the face of his cancer, I think, captures the Olympic spirit like few other athletes can.

But of course there is a debate. Should he have delayed treatment to go to the Olympics? Surely this time has compromised his health, when he could have been operated on immediately and been recovering by now. What is any dream worth if the price is your health, and possibly your life?

Fortunately, Eric's doctors monitored him and did not see the need for immediate care, which Eric says he would have done if it was necessary. Now that the Olympics are over for him, he will be able to focus on his health and hopefully kick his cancer. I support him - with a little relief that he didn't make that final - and I plan to follow his progress throughout his treatment and recovery.

Check out Eric on the CBS Evening News:


"The road to my Olympic dream has, you know, gone over many mountains." An understatement if there ever was one. Sending good karma your way, Eric.

Open Letter: Is It Appropriate?

Breast cancer survivor Suzanne Somers has written an open letter to Christina Applegate, published on People.com. I'm a little dubious about this, as "Thighmaster" Somers clearly likes media attention... but she's a cancer survivor, she's been married for 31 years, and she has built a multi-million dollar empire in addition to her decades-long career as a television actress, so I suppose I can't knock her too badly. Plus, there are some good, positive thoughts here:

Dear Christina,

Cancer is scary, and lonely. You can't ask anyone to make decisions for you because it's just too heavy. There is a lot of 'rush to treatment,' when what you really need is time to research and think about how you want to approach this. Take your time Christina, there is no rush. Take your time and think it through. Use your cancer to learn and grow and as a force to work for you. You might choose to take an alternative approach. There are more options than the ones presented to you in the oncologist's office. You will make it. The success and drive you have had in your career will be the same strengths you will use to win over this nasty disease. And I am here if you want to talk to someone who was 'there.'

Sincerely,
Suzanne Somers

A nice gesture, I guess. But is this really appropriate, or is it just to get a little press? I am going to choose to believe that it's a kind, genuine gesture meant to give support from a breast cancer survivor to a newly diagnosed patient. Perhaps this letter will give hope to others as well. So... okay.

Now back to the Olympics!

Cancer Quote Friday!

As we greet another fabulous Friday, with brains fried by the week and flitting toward the weekend, it is my pleasure to offer someone else's wisdom for your consideration.

"There are no villains in this story in the old-fashioned sense. If anything, we are all victims of the pressures created by a disease that won't wait for answers. We eagerly turn to technologies we hope will work, and by the time we learn that they may not, we are too committed to change course... The fact is oncology is a business, as well as the grounds for trying to keep people from dying of cancer. Sometimes, its business side stands in the way of its larger, more noble goals."
- Devra Davis, The Secret History of the War on Cancer

I have been ploughing through this book since April (yikes!) but am determined to finish it soon! More on this amazing book next week... Have a great weekend!

Cancer Nerd Kudos to Applegate

I was so sad to hear of Christina Applegate's breast cancer diagnosis. The announcement came only five days after another, more positive cancer-related announcement: her participation in the Stand Up to Cancer telecast on September 5. But perhaps the best news of all is that Applegate still plans to participate in the show.

Phew! That was a lot of links there.

I have always loved Christina Applegate. I never really got into "Married With Children" but I always thought she was beautiful, and I was always impressed that she never fell prey to the perils of Hollywood fame. She just seems very down-to-earth. And she is genuinely talented! They don't show "Samantha Who?" here in the UK but it looks supercute and I'm happy she's had this re-boost to her career.

I'm happier, of course, that her diagnosis is an early and positive one, and that she is expected to make a full recovery. And I'm really glad that she will still appear on the SU2C telethon. She will be getting a lot more attention than she would have otherwise, so kudos to her for having the courage to stand as a survivor mere weeks after her diagnosis.

You go girl!

Check this out!

The lovely ladies over at Young Working Women have posted an interview with me! Check it out if you want to learn a little more about me (and see a sneak peek of the photo I sent into SU2C for the montage).

And if you are a young working woman (even if you're between jobs, like me!) I urge you to join this supportive and fabulous group.

It's Never Too Early to Advocate, Apparently

Uy. It's way too early here to be awake and functioning, especially for those of us who are currently funemployed (read: taking a hiatus from work and not back in school quite yet). Alas, I was woken up at 7:30 this morning by the recycling truck, of all things. Only in this quaint lil' ol' country would the garbage men be up and at 'em by dawn. Uy yuy yuy.

But anyway, once I failed at my attempt to sleep in, the www came calling, and I stumbled upon a really great blog: Cancer is Boring, written by Brad O'Brien, a lymphoma survivor (multiple times over) in San Francisco. I love his candid, open, fearless attitude. Brad exemplifies survivorship and advocacy. I hope you will take a moment to check out his blog! I know I will keep reading.

Even though Brad and I don't know each other, we have one thing in common - we were both invited by Tara Settembre, a PR gal and cancer survivor herself, to send photos showing why we stand up against cancer. The photos will be used in a montage on the September 5 airing of Stand Up To Cancer. I will post my photos closer to the air date, so you can keep your eyes peeled for me...

Meanwhile, check out Tara's fabulous blog. She has quite the life out in LA!

I have added both Brad's and Tara's blogs to my new blogroll. If you know of any other great blogs by cancer survivors and advocates, please let me know!

Cancer Quote Fri - uh, Saturday!

Ok, so it's not Friday, but it is in the early morning hours of Saturday here in London - and the very wee hours in the States - so here goes.

I just uploaded my photos from my recent trip to the Midwest, and couldn't wait to share this quote from the Richard & Annette Bloch Cancer Survivors Plaza in Chicago. It is on the first of a series of bronze plaques that surround the plaza entrance.



The plaque reads:

"Cancer is the uncontrolled growth of cells. It is the most feared disease in America, because it is not understood, even though it is not the largest killer. If we understood cancer, we would not be as afraid of it. It is estimated that the average individual has a wildly dividing cell six times a day. The immune system recognizes this, kills it, and we never know the difference. When the immune system lets down, even temporarily, and these dividing cells get established to the point that the immune system cannot control them, we have cancer."

Upon further Googling, it turns out that Richard and Annette Bloch have named a number of these cancer survivor parks all over the USA. Richard Bloch, co-founder of H&R Block, was a lung cancer survivor (!!!) who died of heart failure in 2004 at the age of 78. After being declared cancer free, he and his wife Annette dedicated their lives to helping people with cancer. The R.A. Bloch Cancer Foundation website has some good information; a free e-book for cancer supporters; links to cancer articles and programs; and more. This is an incredibly positive site, clearly reflecting the attitude of its founder.

Ooh, heartwarming stuff! I love it! A great way to start a weekend.

Couric, Curds and Cancer

I was working out in the dinky, musty gym at my mom's apartment complex this morning - much-needed exercise considering the fact that spending time here in the land of cheese curds and bratwurst does not exactly do wonders for my diet - with an old guy on a stationary bike who was watching "The View" on the gym's lone television. Lo and behold, Katie Couric was the first guest! She was there to talk about Stand Up To Cancer. Hooray!

Okay so I just have to say, first and foremost, that it was so great to see Katie on morning television again. As much as I want her to succeed on the CBS Evening News, because she is truly trying to break a barrier being a female anchor in that time slot and I respect that, she really belongs on morning television. Sigh. Well anyway -

Okay I also have to admit that I only caught her about mid-way through her interview, so I didn't get to hear the whole thing but I'm sure it will be posted on YouTube or the SU2C website later today. But anyway -

It just made me happy. Katie talked about the Constellation campaign, where you can name a star for a cancer survivor for just $1. She talked about some other aspects of the program that weren't news to me, but I was delighted to see her this morning.

What is news? In case you haven't heard, there is a stellar line-up being formed for the TV special. In addition to co-hosts Katie Couric, Charles Gibson and Brian Williams, there will be a ton of other great celebs in attendance. Check it: Casey Affleck, Dana Delany, America Ferrera, Danica Patrick, Charlize Theron, Jennifer Aniston, Sally Field, Christina Ricci, Goran Visnjic, Christina Applegate, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Forest Whitaker, Kirsten Dunst, Neil Patrick Harris, Homer and Marge Simpson (love that they are included in the press release!), Josh Brolin, Salma Hayek, David Cook (whose brother is battling brain cancer), Elle Fanning, Scarlett Johansson, Meryl Streep, Jon Favreau, Masi Oka, and Hilary Swank. Phew! The line-up also includes celebrity cancer survivors Fran Drescher, Robin Roberts, Lance Armstrong, and Elizabeth Edwards.

I'm sure they will have many more celebrities join these ranks, and I can't wait to see this list continue to grow.

Good stuff all around! Now back to my cheese curds...

A Dear John Letter

Dear John,

Four years ago today, we had a really sucky day, didn’t we.

Surreally sucky, in fact. I got mom’s call around 6:00am – the dreaded call that I somehow knew was coming that morning. I rolled out of bed, crawling into my teal Gap hoodie that I’ve had since high school – a sweatshirt in July seems crazy I know, but I needed the comfort – and headed to the hospital. I got there, and Mom was there, and you were there. But you weren’t really. Your body was, but you’d already peaced out. So to speak.

But I won’t dwell on that day. Because today is a better 24th of July. We’re still sad, Mom and I. We still had tears in our eyes as we headed to the outlet mall this morning, talking about how you would want us to be bargain-hunting today. Not that we needed anything at the outlets – we’re just trying to distract ourselves. And that’s okay.

The air is thick with you today. And that’s okay too.

At the Coach outlet, Mom treated herself to a good lookin’ signature tote bag – first quality, not the crap they’re making for the outlets these days – with purple patent leather trim. The saleslady who helped us was named Hannah. We took that as a sign that you were with us.

Wherever you are – and I do believe that you are still somewhere in this universe, in some capacity – I hope you are happy, and at peace. I hope you have retained your passion and your intellect and your integrity and your quirks (well, most of them anyway).

I hope you know how much we love you, and will always love you.

From Michigan, then, where Mom is finding much-deserved happiness – though I’m sure that’s not news to you,

Love,
Jennifer

Anniversary Week

Hello from the great state of Michigan!

I am now the proud recipient of a student visa (woohoo!) and am spending a few more days with my mom, trying my best to cheer on the Cubs, eat brats, and get blizzards at the DQ - all cherished American pastimes, at least to me - until I return to London next week.

As for this week, it's a big one for me and my mom. A big, sad one. This is the John Anniversary Week. He and my mom were married (after 18 years of domestic partnership) on July 21 and he died a week later, on July 28. Tomorrow marks the 4th anniversary of his death - and just typing that makes my heart beat a little faster and sends nervous warmth from my heart through my chest down through my arms to my fingertips.

Mom and I got through the wedding anniversary okay. We distracted ourselves by driving to Chicago since my visa appointment was the next day. Tomorrow, for the other anniversary, we will be going outlet shopping, one of our family traditions. Really, our most celebrated family tradition.

John instilled in us a passion for bargain-hunting. He used to tear through the "last chance rack" at the Land's End outlet in Schaumburg, Illinois for dress shirts he could wear to work. For only $5 each, he found dozens of crisp, new Oxford shirts that he wore with a jacket and tie to teach at a boys' school on the Upper East Side of New York City. What landed these nice, clean shirts on the "last chance rack"? These were the shirts that others had had monogrammed with their initials, and then returned to Land's End for whatever reason. Except for the embroidered letters, they were in perfect condition.

Who would want a shirt with someone else's monogram? Well, for 5 bucks and a few laughs, John did. And his students loved him for it. Every day, the boys would file into his classroom and peel back his jacket to reveal the monogram of the day. They never tired of the routine, because the initials were always different. After years of devoted outlet shopping, John had amassed a vast collection of impressively diverse initials. He even found a couple shirts with his own initials - JMH - on them! (Though the boys didn't think those were as funny.)

My mom and I visited the Land's End outlet in Schaumburg when we were in town a few days ago. We scoured the store, finally finding the "last chance rack" buried in with the women's clearance. The dinky rack held only two monogrammed robes (which is somehow a lot less amusing than shirts to me), a hot pink down vest (waaay out of season, that), a pair of jeans that looked like they were made in 1982, and a pair of elastic-waist pants that my grandmother would love. No crisp dress shirts bearing the initials of people we would never know, or, coincidentally, of people we did. No once-in-a-lifetime bargain of a butter yellow short-sleeved polo shirt with "JMH" tastefully embroidered on the chest.

"I guess things change," my mom said.

I guess they must, at some point. And that's okay.

So Much to Learn, So Little Time

All of a sudden it's late July, and I am heading back to the States to visit my family (and, fingers crossed, procure my student visa). My school year is fast approaching, and I am trying not to get cold feet as I ponder jumping into my year-long MBA program two months from now. Instead, I think about these past months - my "independent study time" as I have called them, when I'm not calling myself a lady of leisure or domestic goddess. I almost wish I could say I have gotten bored, or am ready for more structure in my life. But the truth is, this time has been amazing for me and I'm not ready to let it go.

I still have so much to learn! I still have so many books to read! As I began packing to head home, I must have cycled through four or five different cancer books to take on the plane, all of which I want to have under my belt before I start school (and thus no longer have time for any reading other than school reading... sigh). Then I signed into Amazon and ordered another one. Will I have time to do all this reading? No. But I will get to it all eventually, and chronicle it here.

In other news, I was able to interview Sherry Lansing, the former CEO of Paramount Pictures who is working on Stand Up To Cancer. The interview will be published on Look to the Stars soon, and I can't wait for it to be out there in cyberspace! So keep your eyes peeled...

Must get back to packing. Maybe then I'll have some time to read.

Independence Day

To my fellow Americans...

Happy 4th of July!

This is my first 4th in England and I will be celebrating by attending a concert for the Hoodoo Gurus, an 80s rock band from Australia. Crikey! All I want is a brat and a Bud!

I will also be on vacation from July 6-16, but back in action thereafter.

Cheers and ciao!

Colon Cancer Featured on WebMD

I visited WebMD yesterday and was surprised but happy - at first - to see that "Colon Cancer Symptoms" was one of the four featured article tabs (along with an article about how watermelon has Viagra-like effects... Happy 4th of July!) on the front page. How great that they are spotlighting colon cancer, I thought to myself. I clicked the tab, and a handsome and pensive man appeared next to the words "Colon Cancer Symptoms" and "Symptoms usually appear in later stages. Here's what to look for."

A further click led me to the symptoms section of WebMD's Colorectal Cancer Health Center. And again, my initial reaction was, "Wowee! Look at all this great info!" It is a good resource, with information that would be very helpful to someone who is experiencing the obvious symptoms of late-stage colon cancer, or whom has been diagnosed and needs to learn about the disease fast.

But basically, a site like this is not going to help people be any less afraid of colon cancer (or other cancers, if they are similarly discussed, which I assume they are). I know I have to understand that WebMD exists to give unbiased, factual information - and with cancer, the facts are often very, very hard to hear. So I can't wholly blame the website. It just made me feel slightly defeated, I must admit.

I wish that the site could focus more on prevention, especially with colon cancer because it is highly preventable when people are appropriately screened. Instead, the "Prevention" section is buried between "Treatment Overview" and "Home Treatment," which doesn't seem to make a lot of sense.

This issue is bigger than me. After all, who funds WebMD? How does the site make money? Oh, I know! They get revenue from all the pharmaceutical companies who advertise their drugs! And why would drug companies want to advertise on a site that says, "You can prevent this disease from reaching late stages just by getting screened regularly"? Oh. They wouldn't. Huh.

Sigh. Alright, well, moving on.

The Doctor Factor Indeed

There is one more article from the June 23 issue of Newsweek that I have to write about, as it strikes a chord with me and I know it would strike a similar chord with many of the cancer survivors with whom I have worked as an advocate. The Doctor Factor is an important article that raises the issue of compassionate care.

I will say right now that I never met my stepdad John's oncologist. From the way John and my mom would describe this guy, he was big, gruff, and all business. I don’t think he was particularly offensive, but he did not exactly ooze bedside manner either. I'm sure he treated John as best he could, though the more I learn about chemo cocktails and New York's more prominent oncologists (who treated many of my colon cancer survivor friends), the more I feel like this guy was just not invested in John's treatment. Though, to give the oncologist the benefit of the doubt, John's cancer might have been so advanced there was really not much that could have been done beyond extending his life the 20 months that his generic chemo did. We never asked what stage he was - John made that choice and we had to support him in it. So, there's a lot I will never know.

What I do know is that many of my survivor friends went to the same handful of doctors, and have great relationships with them. I have never met a survivor who has heard of John’s oncologist. I have met some of these other doctors and they are absolutely wonderful people. Newsweek profiles a few more fabulous-sounding doctors, from D.C., New York and Boston. The article discusses the importance of genuine doctor-patient bonding, and how these relationships enrich the treatment experience for both parties. Compassionate doctors motivate patients to fight harder. Compassionate doctors don't spout pessimistic statistics. Being a compassionate doctor prevents burnout.

So why do so many doctors lack the very bedside manner that never fails to positively contribute to their patients' journey?

I can't imagine what being an oncologist is like, and I could never do it. But, trying to put myself in that position to answer my own questions, I suppose it's easier to not engage. I mean, how many patients do these doctors have, with how many different cancers, at how many stages? How can you possibly invest personally in everyone?

But how can you not? When I was the coordinator of the NYC chapter of the Colon Cancer Alliance, there were nights when I would come home from running a volunteer meeting and just cry my eyes out. The stories that came out of this one group of people were so surreal, so overwhelming. Stories of miracle responses to chemo, dozens of surgeries, fighting insurance companies. Stories of survival. Stories that bring goosebumps to my arms as I type - because I knew these people. I wanted to know them, wanted to befriend them, wanted to connect with them. And these connections have enriched my life more than anything.

This post is not a tsk tsk to oncologists who lack social skills or choose not to use them with their patients. Everyone handles tough life stuff differently, and the fact that there are people out there who choose to devote their lives to treating cancer patients is miraculous in itself. But I'm glad that Newsweek is making a point that compassionate care does make a difference. Because it does.

Here is What Cancer is, By the Way.

I have to point out this article (and its multimedia incarnation online) from the June 23 issue of Newsweek. The article is cowritten by Robert A. Weinberg - a name I knew sounded familiar to me - the author of One Renegade Cell, one of the books on my reading list. And frankly, after reading this article, I'm not sure I even need the book (but of course I will). This article gives a great, concise, easy to understand introduction to what cancer is, how it starts, and the lifestyle choices that are in our control to lessen our chances of getting it.

One of my initial motivations for starting this blog was that I, a passionate cancer advocate, could not answer this simple question: What is cancer?

I'm getting there though, and I could probably explain it myself, because for such a complex disease, it starts quite simply - but I'll leave it to Dr. Weinberg this time:

"All tumors begin with one renegade cell [and yes, quoting his own book title is what led me to realize who he was]. Initially the cell is just one of about 30 trillion or so in the body. It looks no different from the cells around it, and, like those cells, it divides only if the organ it's part of needs it to divide. Then, even though the organ around it has enough cells, the renegade cell begins to multiply uncontrollably: one cell becomes two, two become four, four become eight, until the descendants are beyond counting."

It sounds so simple, doesn't it? No wonder Nixon declared the War on Cancer in 1971 - a disease that starts with just one stupid, ugly, mutant cell with a bad attitude should be easy enough to cure, right?

Yeah, not so much.

So what can we do, Dr. Weinberg? He says we can stop smoking (duh), eat foods that don't have a bunch of creepy chemicals in them (duh), and get off our butts on a regular basis (duh). This is not news to me, and it's probably not news to you. But apparently Americans can't hear this enough - our most present cancers (breast, colon, prostate) occur at a fraction of our rate in other parts of the world.

This article may not be groundbreaking, but I sure hope a lot of people read it. If my cancer reading has taught me anything, it's that this disease has a nasty way of striking at random and without bias. But there are fundamental things we can do to prevent cancer - and it goes without saying that we need to be doing them.

I suppose I won't be going out for fish 'n chips for dinner after all.

Happy Birthday, Dear Nelson

The 46664 Concert Honouring Nelson Mandela at 90

Last Friday, June 27 witnessed an historic concert in Hyde Park, London that I was fortunate to be able to attend: a musical celebration of Nelson Mandela's 90th birthday, with proceeds going to 46664, Mandela's charity initiative to raise global awareness about HIV/AIDS. So this post is not directly cancer related, but it was an event that enriched my life, and about which I wrote an objective article today for Look to the Stars that left me craving the chance to write about, well, how I felt, not just what I saw.

So here I am.

For a run-down of the performers, check out Look to the Stars or the BBC coverage.

What I really want to say is this: I got to sing "Happy Birthday" to Nelson Mandela. I got to sing "Happy Birthday" to Nelson Mandela. I got to sing "Happy Birthday" to Nelson Mandela.

How many times have we sung this song in our lives? To how many people? At how many parties, in how many silly harmonies?

It's nothing but a little ditty of a song, and yet the fact that I had the honor, the absolute once-in-a-lifetime privilege, of singing that very song to Nelson Mandela as he stood on stage, escorted by a loved one and surrounded by the evening's superstar enertainers, was more than enough to bring tears to my eyes and rolling down my cheeks. It was utterly humbling, singing this everyday song to one of history's most courageous, compassionate, visionary men.

Before this concert, Nelson Mandela ranked right up there in my mind with the likes of Mother Teresa and other such larger-than-life figures. I knew who he was, I knew the outline of his life, I knew he was a great, great man. But seeing him on stage, joining in to serenade him, and hearing him speak was just humbling.

Celebrated British humorist and actor Stephen Fry said it best when he came on stage later during the show - he spoke of Mandela's entrance and the subsequent crowd reaction and said it felt like "waves of love" were washing over the audience and crashing up onto the stage.

Indeed it did. And who wouldn't want to take a little time to frolic in that?

Care Packages and Katie Couric

My mom has always been great about sending me mail. When I was in college, she sent me at least one piece of mail a week. I probably never admitted to her how much that meant to me - being able to open my little mailbox in the student center and see a brightly colored greeting card or - even better! - a slip indicating that I had a package to pick up. But I'm sure she knew.

Now that I live across the pond, she has gotten back into her care package mode. Though these days the packages that the mailman crams through the slim slot in our front door contain more credit card bills and other grown-up mail than fun things. But her care packages are always thoughtful and always appreciated (I hope you're reading this, Mom!).

Yesterday, I received a big cushy envelope filled with newspaper clippings, bills (told you so), and the June 23 issue of Newsweek magazine, which contains a lot of great articles about cancer. But I will get to those later. Also included in the package was a photocopy of another Newsweek piece, written by Katie Couric back in April. The article discusses the tenth anniversary of her husband Jay Monahan's death and how Katie chose to share some of the condolence letters she received a decade ago with her daughters, who were only 2 and 6 when Jay died of colon cancer.

I am a big, big Katie Couric fan. I have met her on a couple of occasions and she has always been gracious and lovely. The first time I met her was fairly soon after my stepdad's death. I had run a race in Central Park on a beautiful weekend morning, and my mom had come to the finish line. After the race we went to a greasy-yet-swanky-spoon brunch spot, the likes of which you could only find on the Upper East Side of Manhattan. And there was Katie, eating with a friend, in her exercise clothes with no makeup. My mom and I spent our entire meal debating about whether or not to say something to her, and had decided against it until we both got up to pay our tabs at the same time.

There we were, in line behind Katie Couric to pay for our diner brunch. My heart pounded as I decided to just go for it, and said, "Excuse me, Katie?"

Most of the conversation remains a blur. I remember that my mom and I quickly told her that we had lost my stepdad recently to colon cancer, so that she didn't think we were just quack fans. She immediately took off her sunglasses to make eye contact with us as my mom told her how much she admires the grace with which Katie handled her husband's death.

"You have been a model to me," my mom said. "It hasn't been easy."

Katie replied, "Yeah, it really sucks."

But not in a Debbie Downer way. In a way that sealed my respect for Katie Couric for life. It was a moment so genuine it gives me goosebumps to write about it now, years later. In that moment, two widows of men who'd lost their lives too soon to a disease that is all too preventable instantly and deeply connected. If only for a moment.

My mom and I were also at Katie's last day on the Today Show, and appeared on camera for fleeting seconds with a group of colon cancer survivors and advocates. It was a hoot!

I like to call this one Katie and Me. Heh.

Anyway, this is all to say that I respect Katie a great deal, and so was excited to be able to read a piece of her writing.

I got through the article without crying, which was an achievement. Everyone who is affected by cancer has a different story to tell, and hearing a new story always makes you reflect on your own. As heartbroken as I remain about my stepdad John's death at age 64, attempting to fathom what it was like for Katie to lose her husband at age 41 - yes, forty-one - is just impossible. To lose your life partner when your daughters are too young to remember him... it's just one of those things that should never happen to anyone.

Katie's story is one of many that fuel my passion to raise awareness about this disease in the hopes of eradicating it. It is not an easy story to hear, but I deeply admire that she is putting herself out there - as a mother, a widow, and a cancer advocate.

I wonder where my mom and I will be, what we'll be up to on the tenth anniversary of John's death. This July marks the fourth anniversary, so we have a long way to go. But I'm sure the time will fly, and I can only hope that when my mom and I inevitably reach that decade milestone, that we remain as full of grace and passion as Katie Couric.

Exciting Writing News!

Here is what made my day yesterday:

I had been thinking for a long time about starting a blog that would combine some of my main interests: cancer advocacy, philanthropy (in my former life I was a fundraiser), and celebrity pop culture. I wanted to write about celebrities (and other wealthy folk, and even some not as wealthy folk) giving their time, money, and other resources to non-profit organizations, in an effort to get the word out there that giving is good, and easy to do, and vitally important to more people than one can fathom.

But I was so overwhelmed at the thought of starting this venture. Where to even begin? How to get the word out? Etcetera.

So finally yesterday I did a Google blog search, just in case someone had already seized my idea (as is so often the case with blogs these days, considering the gazillions of them that are out there)... and lo and behold, I came upon this:

Look to the Stars! A fantastic blog started by a husband and wife team, containing a vast online library of celebrities and their charities, as well as the last news in celebrity giving, all in a really well-written and fun-to-read format.

I emailed the editors immediately, offering to help them in any way that I could. I heard right back from them, and will be starting to write for them soon! I am so excited to add another dimension to my blogging experience. Not to mention the fact that I will be able to indulge in my fondness for pop culture and do some good while I'm at it!

Take a moment to check it out. And keep your eyes peeled for my byline, coming soon!

More Boobs! (A Book Review: Part II)

Now that I have slept on Bathsheba's Breast - or, well, on my thoughts about this book, I mean - I have come to the conclusion that, although it is not an easy read, this is a truly remarkable book. And I might be a little oversensitive because a) I am a woman with breasts, and b) I take my cancer reading very personally. So there. I admit it.

When I go back through the notes I took on each chapter of this book and attempt to digest everything I learned, I am almost overwhelmed with knowledge and awareness. I feel that now I have a solid knowledge of the history of this disease and also an awareness of the bigger picture: how breast cancer has evolved from being the original cancer, the only one known for generations because it could be seen without an x-ray or an autopsy, to setting the standard for cancer research, treatment, awareness, and advocacy. Olson covers this evolution in depth, and although he chronologically bounces around a bit, his efforts are fairly extraordinary.

In an attempt to be fairly concise... here are some very valuable things I learned from this book (with links to Wikipedia if you're interested):

• Breast cancer has taken the lives of countless notable women, from Theodora (wife of Justinian I) to Adolf Hitler's mom to Linda McCartney.
• Hippocrates named cancer for "karkinos" or "crab" because tumors seemed to have tentacles that resembled crabs' legs.
• Mastectomies were being performed in Germany as early as the 1600s! Yikes.
• And these surgeries were performed without anesthesia - that didn't come into the picture until 1846.
  
• William Steward Halsted invented the radical mastectomy (removal of breast, axillary bodes, both chest muscles in a single en bloc procedure - I didn't know what it was, either) in the 1880s. He was also a coke addict. Oops.
• By the mid-1950s, a variety of surgeries were being used on women, sometimes in succession, with each being more gruesome than the last. Needless to say, faith in doctors and science at this time was very, very high.
• Radiation also came into use in the 50s and 60s - but mortality rates for each of these treatments (radiation, radical surgery, lumpectomy, etc.) were similarly high.
• This is gross: due to the high mortality rates, every country except for the US opted for the less invasive treatments. American surgeons (most of whom were male) were the last to cling to the radical mastectomy.
• Luckily, the feminism movement gained momentum in the 60s, and empowered women were on a roll by the time Nixon announced the "War on Cancer" in 1971.
• Women like Shirley Temple Black, Happy Rockefeller, and Betty Ford started speaking out about their diagnoses in the 70s. Amazing and so brave.
• Rose Kushner was an incredible cancer advocate who took control of her diagnosis and treatment. Her courage paved the way for other women to have more control over their treatment options. Kushner was diagnosed in 1974 and died in 1990.
• Ruth Handler, the inventor of the Barbie doll, lost one breast to cancer in 1970, and the other in 1989. She started a breast prothesis company and was another incredible advocate.
• Breast cancer has been riddled with controversy for decades, but the disease has made its way into mainsteam consciousness, which ultimately bodes well for the cause.

Phew! And there is more where that came from. A highly recommended read indeed. I just hope that someday a book with this depth and detail will be written about colon cancer.

Boobs Boobs Boobs (A Book Review: Part I)

One of the greatest accomplishments of the breast cancer movement (besides, you know, the gazillions of dollars that have been raised for research, the groundbreaking treatments that have emerged, and the tens of thousands of lives that are being saved as a result) is that people are no longer embarrassed to talk about boobs.

I have participated in many breast cancer race events in New York City, and I remember the last time seeing a group of women walking the race course wearing hats in the shape of bared breasts - yes, naked boobs, nipples and all. How great is that?

Part of me is envious of this movement, I have to say. Only because colon cancer is my own personal cause, to which I owe my life's greatest heartbreak, and I want people talking about butts the way they talk about breasts. I think this is happening, slowly but (I hope) surely. The Colon Cancer Alliance is starting a race event called the Undy 5000, in which participants are encouraged to run/walk in their underwear. I think this is pretty genius and I hope the event will go far in getting people comfortable talking about butts and cancer. The less fear we have in addressing these topics, the more empowered we become.

But back to boobs.

Bathsheba's Breast, by James S. Olson, was the second book in my cancer curriculum. Compared to One in Three, this read was a little harsh. If Adam Wishart had been holding my hand as I tiptoed into the acquisition of some solid knowledge about this disease, then Olson threw me into an ice bath. That's not to say I did not enjoy the book - in fact I learned a great deal from it - but it was a toughie.

Reading this book, especially as a woman, felt at times like having a male doctor with little bedside manner. Olson talks about horrible breast tumors and surgeries as if discussing a baseball game. It's gruesome stuff and he makes no apologies for that. That being said, it also gives what I have to trust is a realistic account of the toll this disease took on women hundreds (and, indeed, thousands) of years ago, which is key to truly grasping how far we have come in treating cancer. I just had to read the book in smallish doses because of its graphic nature. But ultimately, Olson sets an example for the rest of us to not be afraid to talk about cancer.

In fact, the book begins with a discussion of his own cancer - a sarcoma in his arm that recurred while researching and writing Bathsheba's Breast. Olson lost his left arm to cancer, and says, "Although I know nothing of what it is like to lose a breast, I do understand... the anxiety of confronting one's own mortality, and the trauma of saying goodbye to a body part."

Heavy stuff. And in the interest of small doses, I will continue the review tomorrow...

Cancer Quote Friday!

As we greet another fabulous Friday, with brains fried by the week and flitting toward the weekend, it is my pleasure to offer someone else's wisdom for your consideration.*

"Cancer is a stubborn disease, revealing its secrets grudgingly, and scientific progress is measured in inches, or better yet, in extra days survived. In a country conditioned to extraordinary success - to conquering the wilderness, to winning wars, to putting men on the moon - a country where most people count on getting their own way, cancer's intransigence bears witness to human frailty. "

- James S. Olson, Bathsheba's Breast: Women, Cancer, and History

Book review coming next week!

*Read: I may or may not be feeling too lazy to write my own post. I think I will stick with this theme for Fridays from now on...

Another Fabulous Website: CaringBridge

I feel like I've been posting a lot about websites lately, but there are so many great free resources out there to help people, I can't help but get excited. This whole "Web 2.0" movement, as I am coming to understand it, has the potential to do such great things and enrich people's lives. It brings out the best in good people who sit at their computers wanting to do good things for the world. Who can argue with that?

Case in point: CaringBridge. It seems as if this website has been around for about 10 years, and I sorely wish I had known about it when my stepdad was sick. The site (and the non-profit organization that runs it) provides free websites to "support and connect loved ones during critical illness, treatment and recovery." Whether the critical time stems from a cancer diagnosis, a car accident, a complicated pregnancy, or anything similarly serious, this site allows for the creation of an interactive website with features including an online journal/blog, guestbook, photo gallery, an online communities so that the families on CaringBridge can reach out to each other.

When my stepdad John was sick, I remember sending out mass email after mass email, adjusting each email depending on the group to which it was sent - my mom's family, my dad's family, my college friends, my coworkers, my mom's colleagues. I didn't mind doing it, but there were many other things I could have been doing with that precious time. It would have been amazing to be able to have a website where we could post just once to update everyone, and be able to show John the guestbook entries written in support of him.

Well, if it couldn't happen for us, I'm glad that 100,000 other families (!!!) have used this service, and I hope that this organization continues to thrive.

To donate to CaringBridge, click here.

LIVESTRONG Indeed

As far as I'm concerned, the Lance Armstrong Foundation can basically do no wrong. I deeply admire how Lance has embraced his survivorship and committed himself to helping others through their cancer journeys. Now, the LAF has launched LIVESTRONG.com, a health, fitness and lifestyle site.

This site is fantastic! It includes a variety of articles on every topic you can imagine. You can register with the site to engage in its online community, set goals (or, as they call them, "dares") for yourself, and track your progress. The Dares include everything from "Drink more water" to "Spend time with family" to "Complete a triathalon."

There is also a section called "The Daily Plate" which offers nutritional information for specific foods, an online food diary, and interactive feedback. So cool!

So while this site (and thus, this post) is not directly cancer-related, I am all for *free* resources that help you, as my friend Sarah says (courtesy of Oprah), "live your best life." This is the one shot we get, and this is the one body we get, so we need to pamper ourselves in health, life, and love.

First Attempt at the Big Cancer Picture

So I just spent way too much time this afternoon creating a cancer timeline in Microsoft Paint that is really hard to read. Oops. But I am going to publish it anyway! This was my understanding of what I am calling the Big Cancer Picture (how it started, how treatments began and have developed, the roots of cancer advocacy, etc.) after reading

One in Three. So, get out your microscope, and without further adieu...

P.S. It's legible if you click on it! Cheers!

SU2C on Facebook!

If you are getting as into Stand Up To Cancer as I am...

And you are on Facebook...

Become a fan of Stand Up To Cancer on Facebook! Woohoo!

Back to work! (A Book Review)

Ok, it's been awhile since I've hit the books - well, cancer books at least. I've taken a slight vacay from the heavy reading and have been thoroughly enjoying Chasing Harry Winston by Lauren Weisberger (See? I'm not just a nerd, I'm also a girl!) but as my school year approaches there is still a lot I need to learn.

So to get myself back in the mood, I'll post a couple reviews of books I've read this year. I am eager to hear if anyone out there has also read these books, so please leave your comments!

First up: One in Three: A Son's Journey into the History and Science of Cancer by Adam Wishart.

Frankly, I could not have kicked off my quest to learn about cancer with a better book for me. I had just moved to the UK from New York City, and lo and behold, Wishart is a British TV producer. I felt right at home, both in my new home and in my new book.

Wishart masterfully weaves together anecdotes of his father's cancer battle with his own fearless quest to learn about the documented history of the disease that was slowly breaking down his father's body. His ultimate take on the whole thing is this:

"We need desperately, therefore, to learn how to talk about cancer and to regard it no longer as a painful taboo. There is an urgent need to do so, because each of us will one day be touched by the disease, as one in three people will be diagnosed with it within their lifetimes. It is time to understand that cancer is becoming a disease to live with rather than only die from."

Word!

I couldn't have said it better myself.

After reading this book I felt like I had a very good understanding of the basic history of cancer - when it was first documented (a malignant tumor scar on the jawbone of Homo erectus?!); how treatments began and (thankfully) have progressed over hundreds of years; cells, radiation, and chemo - oh my! And also Nixon's "War on Cancer," alternative medicine, genetics, the latest advances in treatment and the movement towards "living with cancer" instead of dying from it. Phew! Glad someone else has done all that research so I don't have to. I'll just read your books, thank you very much.

Needless to say, I was excited to find a kindred spirit in my first foray into cancer lit. I even emailed Adam to tell him as much. He never replied, but I am determined to not let that affect my feelings for this book. I am profoundly grateful for its existence and hope to be able to both teach about cancer and encourage others to approach the disease as fearlessly as Wishart exemplifies for us all.

SUTV

Ok so I have been poring over the Stand Up To Cancer website and I am loving every bit of it! It has been a long time since a cancer initiative has gotten me so riled up.

There are some fabulous clips, both serious and not-so-serious, in the SUTV section of the website.

So far my faves are the PSA and the Daily Show cast. A to the Mazing.

And I will freely admit that I think part of why I am so excited by SU2C (their clever little acronym) is that so many celebrities are involved - I love the combination of celebs and non-celebs in the PSA, for example. On the one hand, this initiative combines my two passions: cancer and pop culture. But on the more serious other hand, celebrities have incredible power to do good, and it truly warms my heart to see everyone from Tobey Maguire to Susan Sarandon to Lance Armstrong rallying for SU2C.

My fellow colon cancer advocate friends and I would always lament, somewhat morbidly I admit, that no hot, young celebrity has survived colon cancer. There are plenty of young people diagnosed every year, unfortunately. And there are plenty of celebrities who have been diagnosed with colorectal cancer (Carmen Marc Valvo, Joel Siegel, Farah Fawcett) too. But colon cancer does not have its Lance Armstrong or its Sheryl Crow or Cynthia Nixon.

So if colon cancer must continue to wait for the celebsurvivor who can take the cause into mainstream pop culture and make it a little more fabulous, at least plenty of celebrities have stepped up - sorry, stood up - for cancer through this amazing initiative.

As Tesco, a supermarket chain here in the UK, has as its motto, "Every little helps."

[Which I always think is missing a "bit"... but whatev. It gets the point across.]

Stand Up To Cancer

This is amazing!

I have just scratched the surface of this website, but WOW. On September 5, 2008, the US television networks ABC, CBS, and NBC are joining together to air a one-hour "interactive television special" that will hopefully raise gazillions of dollars for cancer research.

How cool that this unprecedented joint effort of the three major networks is focused on cancer. While there are plenty other causes out there that merit this kind of attention, of course I believe that cancer deserves it most, as it is a disease that does not discriminate, and attacks at random. While there are certain things we can do that can help ward off cancer, at the end of the day it affects us all somehow. I am thrilled that these networks have recognized the urgency of this cause. Kudos to the Entertainment Industry Foundation for making this happen.

Besides being a celebrity phonathon (ooh! I wonder who will be answering the phones! Makes me wish I were in the States... I will definitely be encouraging my friends and family to call in and donate), the special will also focus on the latest research and advances in conquering this disease.

This is fabulous. I am going back to the website right now to find out more!

The Interview

But back to my interview. The scholarship program is funded by a generous family whose wealth runs deep and wide (and I am keeping my fingers crossed that I will be a recipient of a teeny bit of it!). One of the final questions in my interview, administered by a couple of big-wig staff members of the MBA program, was this:

"Say you receive this scholarship, and this family invests, oh, 30,000 quid in you. What will be the return on their investment?"

Yikes.

But I rallied. Made a charming comment about how it's too bad I would never get to meet them because they'll miss out on my fabulous personality (which, now that I think about it, was actually kind of a dumb thing to say. Uy yuy yuy.) - but then -

"Frankly? Cancer." [Ack! Not that the members of this family will get cancer - oops.] "Being a cancer advocate is not easy work. Devoting my life to working to eradicate a disease that has no cure, and that will affect everyone in the world in some way, and to which I have such a personal connection, is not an easy thing for me to do. Each time I read a book on cancer, I have to alternate with an easy beach read to decompress a bit -" [TMI. Damn.] "But there is great work to be done. There are lives to be touched, and changed, and improved, and I know that making those personal connections will sustain me throughout my career. I can think of nothing greater than helping to support those who are faced with cancer while educating others and working to eradicate the disease itself. I can think of nothing I would rather do. It's not an easy route, but I know there are great rewards in store."

Huh. Well, I can't say I nailed it. But I was me. And all I can do now is hope that fam decides to toss a little dough my way.

I'm back!

Yay.

So, today I interviewed for a huge-ass scholarship at the Uni where I will be starting my MBA in the fall. Leading up to this interview I had to do a lot of thinking about my volunteer work as a cancer advocate, among other things, and it was great to reconnect with that part of myself. I feel reinvigorated, and after what has been kind of a crazy time I am ready to get back into my cancer research (I always get a kick out of calling it that, because I could not be LESS of a scientist…) and thus will be posting more often starting… Now.

Dry eyes and feeling inspired by "Take One Step - A Conversation About Cancer"

Phew. Made it through this one without emptying another box of tissues. "Take One Step - A Conversation About Cancer" is a half-hour panel discussion tacked onto the PBS special "The Truth About Cancer." Hosted by Linda Ellerbee (who is totally fab and a breast cancer survivor), the discussion features four doctors, three of whom are oncologists, all of whom are also cancer survivors. Linda led a Q&A that was insightful and uplifting, and made me wish that one of these guys had been John's oncologist (who, instead, was a burly dude with no bedside manner or inkling of empathy).

A couple of points really stood out to me, and I know I will be trying to keep these things in mind as I continue my reading and research and the introspection that comes along with it. First, Ellerbee and Dr. Paul Brenner talked about how cancer is ennobling. How cancer shows the "nobility of what it is to be human." It's still a crappy and horrific disease... but it brings out the best in people. It boils life down to its bare essentials and its true priorities. I think the term "ennobling" hits the nail on the head - it captures in one word what I was trying to describe at the end of my post yesterday. And it's so true.

The other most wonderful part of this program came right at the end, when Ellerbee asked the panelists, "How do you restore hope to those who have lost it?" Dr. Brenner replied that he believes in the power of visualization, that he asks patients to write down their life stories, to make a video, to write letters to people they love, to "finish unfinished business."

Then he said, "I ask them to see themselves in health and stay in the present. I ask them to really look at their life because the only thing that really counts in the whole journey through life is love."

Word.

Ellerbee went on to conclude, "Cancer is a part of our past, it is a part of our present because we choose to speak about it and for the same reason will be a part of our future but it is not who we are. Cancer is not who anybody is."

And that's true too. For the first few months after John died, all I could think about, and see in my head, was his diseased, ailing body as it broke down more and more each day until, finally, the cancer won. I was both fascinated, on a very primitive level, and horrified, and overflowing with grief as these thoughts of his decline consumed me. I still think about it from time to time, because witnessing the total breakdown of a human body is just such an odd thing - on the one hand, it's one of the most natural processes in the world (as Dr. Brenner said on the show, "We are all born terminal."); but one the other hand, it is, thankfully, not something you see every day. Now, though, for the most part, when I think about John, it's the pre-cancer memories that are foremost in my mind. Because cancer was just one small part of John's life - granted, it's what ended his life, but the disease in no way defined him. Cancer was just a roll of the dice.